Ever felt the deep pain of someone leaving your life?
Has someone close to you died?
Have you ever felt the heartache of a relationship ending?
Oucharama! Yes of course you have... you are human... and it is natural for all of the things and the people that we love to come and go at some stage.
The abandonment wound within us all is a deeeeeeeep one! It's as deep as the Grand Canyon and as wide as the Pacific Ocean!
Going into the wound is one of the most courageous things we can ever do. So we often avoid it at all costs!
It shows up on the surface of our lives as mental obsessions (aka super busy mind!), addictions (pass me another block of chocolate now, oh heck make it a wine or ten!), neurotic tendencies (I will work myself into the ground trying to be a superhuman who's not allowed to make a mistake!), control behaviours (life must go the way I want it to or look out!)... all in the attempt to avoid the pain of abandonment lurking within.
NEWS FLASH! It is essential for us to face the pain of abandonment, to uncover the illusion of it and reveal the connectedness of life. In fact it is vital if we are to be truly happy and free.
So let's do it! Shall we?
Are YOU ready to plunge yourself into the centre of your abandonment wound?
Come on! It will be fun...
Ok yes it may be a bit painful too! It's true.. it will hurt for a little bit!
...to walk in voluntarily will save you years of destructive behaviours, going round in circles, pushing against life and getting nowhere. It will save you years of emotional patterns, heartache and mind attacks.
A bit of short term pain for long term freedom and happiness is certainly a great investment in my humble opinion... and the opinion of many of my clients who have had the courage to dive in too!
Steps to dissolve abandonment into freedom!
1. Whenever you notice any of the following arise... STOP!
(Neediness, clinging, obsessing, controlling, crazy busy mind, exhaustion, loneliness, heartache)
2. Close your eyes and take your focus away from the outside circumstances. Take your eyes off whoever or whatever has triggered you.
3. Put your investigator hat on and explore your inner world.
4. Breathe deeply, open and surrender to whatever feelings and emotions that arise. Continue to drop deeper and deeper into those feelings. Take your focus down into the centre of them. Welcome them, invite then, give them a cup of tea and really listen to them.
5. Try not to get the violins out... oh poor me... and just listen to the pain that is rising. Feel it fully! Continue to breathe, open, surrender. Allow yourself to drop through the layers of emotion... rather than getting stuck and wallowing there. Your breath will help you to keep surrendering.
6. If you find that you get stuck at this point... contact me to book a coaching session and we can pump through it together. It is much easier to be lead through by some-one who has been there themselves, who can be fully present with you, and guide you past the minds sneaky avoidance tactics!
7. You will know that you have surrendered fully when you begin to feel some peace entering. At the core of all of our intense emotions is the ocean of peace! Yay!
8. This is the moment that the gem is revealed. The reward for your courage to dive in is offered on a silver platter. The almighty freaking fabulous liberating truth of life itself is uncovered. While on the surface we may feel waves of pain responding to the appearance of abandonment.... at the core we can wake up to the truth of the vast and eternally connected source of all of life! This is the invitation that abandonment offers!
Are you willing to accept it's invitation?
The Wellness Adventure is a guided encounter through the layers of your being all the way home to your true nature of peace. If you book before Dec 31st you save $100. Hop to it if your instincts are ignited!
I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below and please share the love with your tribe.
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